Friday, July 19, 2013

The BEST Daddy in the Whole Wide World!

I could not have chosen a better Daddy for the boys than my Guardian. We took the boys to a local gymnastics place that has open gym hours on the weekend. There were all kinds of children and parents, and Guardian, who is still relatively new to being a Daddy, well, he moved easily between the two boys, more easily than these 'experienced parents'. He moved with such ease that we found ourselves playing not only with our boys, but with children at loose ends that other parents could not keep up with because they were with others of their brood. Today he has taken them for boy's day out...they've never had that. And it makes me so happy I could cry. They have never had a man take care of them like that. They have never had a man SEE them the way he does. And I am grateful

He is also a better Daddy than I could ever have hoped for for myself. I see what other Daddies in the kink community can be (Hello FetLife K&P O_o), and it can be scary. My Daddy, he sees when I am at loose ends, when I am overwhelmed, when little me is struggling, and he carves out places for me to just 'be' in the day. Daddy gives me daily tasks, to keep me centered during the day. Often those things are for my submissive self, because I am feeling a bit at loose ends or simply to keep me focused on him, on us. Others are things that are designed to make me stop and be gentle with myself. Once a task was - take 10 minutes and enjoy a piece of chocolate!

Most of the time, after having discovered little me, I felt that she was the small scared part of me; the part that endured horrific things; the part that was scared that she was 'bad', never good enough. Daddy coaxed her out. Little by little she would come out and see what he would do. He would literally and figuratively come to her level and invite her with open arms. She is more confident with him now. Sometimes, when I am overwhelmed, the tasks are designed for her to come out and play - color Daddy a picture, draw me something.

Daddy never thinks I am silly. He loves all of me, big me and little me. He enjoys being my Daddy...wow!
I used to have an army of stuffed animals when I was little. Little by little I allowed people to tell me they were immature and the army dwindled. Daddy knows I love the minions! He had a friend of his make me one!
 

 Isn't he adorable?!

Daddy asked me what I wanted most in the whole wide world....and of course I said an otter! They are so adorable I could die!!!!! I mean who could resist??? 
 
AWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

And Daddy said...........no. 
but Daddy why?
.....................................because they are wild animals, little one
but Daddy they're SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cute!!!
....................................they may be cute but they belong in the wild, where they will be happy
but they could be happy in the bathtub!
.....................................but not be really happy, little girl, they belong in the wild with other otters
Oooooo! Ooooooo! We could get two so they won't be lonlies!!!!!!
......................................no
*sigh*

But THEN...... a package came and what was in the package?

Otteres!!!!


One weekend we were going to the pool and passed a yard sale with the MOST adorable HUGE teddy bear. Daddy asked what I was looking at & I told him the big bear. We went to the pool and had a great day and when we came home Daddy said he forgot something in the car. I was getting the laundry together from the pool and when I came back to the living room, guess what I saw?

OMG!!!!!! Isn't he so gorgeous??? And yes it's pink, but it's a he 'cause Daddy and I had just watched a Twilight marathon and I wanted to name him Benjamin after my favoritest other vampire, the one who could control all the elements...... like the Avatar!!! I LOVE him! I thanked Daddy and told him I had wanted one and he asked why I hadn't told him. I said because I'm a grown woman and maybe it's silly. He said it wasn't silly at all, and I'm not a grown woman, I'm only 6 :)

So the bed that used to have nothing on it, now looks like this:


Theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen, after we saw Despicable Me 2 and went to Walmart they had MINION toys!!!!! And Daddy said we could get some. I was so excited! Then I said something about opening them and he said........no :(    because they were collectibles and had to stay in the package. The boys thought that was terrible that I wasn't allowed to play with them. So we went BACK to Walmart but they were almost sold out, and Daddy said we'd keep checking back to get them all. But he also bought an extra:

Minion Phil!!!!

so I could play with him :D How awesome is that?

Little by little, day by day, he shows me it is okay to be who I am, that I don't have to hide any part of me from him, that it's okay to be little, it's okay to be silly, it's okay to color, it's okay to ooh and aah over bright colors and sparkles, it's okay to have a natural sense of wonder in the world around me, it's okay to cry over commercials and silly stuff, and there is never any little part of me that I need to hide from him. He loves all of me, all of the time, without reservation, without condition. And I love him the same way. I hope that I show him as boundlessly as he shows me. I have the BEST Daddy in the whole wide world.


HER GUARDIAN:

It is a true honor to show My Chinadoll that I love her just as she is and that it's okay to have that beautiful sense of wonder that we all lost sometime along the way. She truly makes me feel alive in a way that I had been missing for many a year. She is my true treasure and I can be myself with her. I love that she can be little around me - her true self...that is a treasure!

23 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for sharing ALL of you with us. Thanks for sharing your experiences with your Guardian. I'm sure that was scary to do...share your little china doll with us. He is indeed a pretty magical Guardian! You are very luck! CONGRATS you two.

    hugs
    fiona

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    1. Hi fiona :) Thanks for reading. I go places I never imagined I could go with anyone with Daddy. It's wonderful to be small and silly and vulnerable and SAFE. I am most lucky :)

      <3
      cd

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    2. Thanks for reading SirQsmlb!

      Thank you for taking the journey with me and my little one. It has allowed us to grow and experience each other in beautiful new ways! She is an absolutely vital part of my life!

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  2. Awe CD I LOVE this, you do indeed have such an awesome, wonderful Daddy! Hey, any Daddy who assigns a task of eating chocolate is definitely the best! LoL

    Seriously, it's wonderful to see how he takes such great care of you and the obvious deep love and connection you share. How great that you are able to share all of yourself with him and be your true self.

    OMG, otters .. I LOVE them ... I WANT several *pout*.

    Hugs,
    Roz

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    1. Hi, Roz! IKR? He takes awesome care of me, and I have never been so connected to another human.

      Ooooooohhhh!!! Oooooooooohhhhhh!!!!! You and me can have an otter far! We'll rescue them and stuff! Daddy's can't say much about rescue work, right??

      <3
      cd

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    2. Hi Roz!

      I try very hard to take the very best care of my little girl. Every daddy knows that giving chocolate to his little girl is very important!

      Thanks for posting!

      -HG

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  3. That is so awesome CD, that not only have you found a Daddy for yourself but he also is a great Dad to your sons. A truly amazing man!

    You are all so blessed!

    (((hugs)))
    LK

    (I love my stuffies too!) ;)

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    1. Thanks Lost Kittie :D He IS a most amazing man, he takes my breath away, and I love seeing him love the children and seeing them adoring him. We have been most blessed!

      <3
      cd

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    2. Hello Lost Kittie!

      I try to be worthy of my little girl and our family, they are the brightest and most vibrant part of my life!

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  4. Minions!!!!!! You have an amazing Daddy who loves you very much! You deserve it!

    big big hugs
    p

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    1. Thanks! He does love me very much! Everyone deserves to be loved like that!

      <3

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    2. I do lover her so very much P! I feel very privileged and blessed to be a part of her life!

      - HG

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  5. Scary K&P?? Hee hee, we call it "Kittens & Puppies" in my group of friends. Most of the time it's pretty damn vanilla. LOL

    I am soooo jealous of your minions and otters!! They're sooo cute!!! Otters are like the most adorable animals ever!

    So glad you're able to let your "little" out in safe ways and in an accepted space. :D :D :D

    I'm still working on my Sir. He doesn't quite understand the concept of "little"s. I'll get there with Him. ^_^

    Oh so happy for you!!

    *hugs tight*

    ~JAS

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    1. Oooooh JAS, you seen the ones I've seen? O_o Barbed-wire floggers and tarped off play areas O_O Needle play with like a 19 mm needle *faint*. Or the one with various needles through her eyebrows and 4 through both lips? Yikes! Very scary stuff for a 6 year old >.<

      IKR?!?!?! That's what I keep telling him. And he gets that beleaguered, patient but exasperated tone and look - sigh - But I'll share mine :)

      He can write my Daddy if he likes. I think a lot of people don't quite understand littles. We have found that most people, very much like us, who are D/lg are closer to M/s than the average.

      *hugs tight back*
      <3

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    2. Hello JAS!

      I am so grateful that she gets to let her little out with me. It is a true honor being a daddy and I wake up every day with a smile on my face because of it!

      -HG

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  6. It's nice that you are able to open up to him and be yourself.

    hugs, saturn

    btw: I color too. C bought me crayons and a few coloring books :)

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    1. oh and I LOVE the yin yang w/ the tree

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    2. It is a blessing, I've always had to hide parts of myself from people in my life. To be totally open an honest and unfiltered is amazing freedom.

      Thanks! It didn't just speak to me, it literally screamed, lol.

      <3

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    3. Hello Saturn2013

      I love that she is opening up and sharing a very intimate and special world...She truly is my treasure!

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  7. Holy cow that bear is huuuuuge and how adorable are the minion and the otter! I'm so happy for you two. It's great to have someone to be completely there for all parts of you and to support you along the way. Plus who doesn't like coloring, being silly and sparkly things :)
    <3 Lily

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    1. I know! I had a headache & laid down on the bed & Daddy said he would lay down with me. He had the light on doing some things first & I was being all light sensitive & hiding my face in the bear. Daddy turned around and asked if I was gonna make room for him, lolol.

      It is! He gets as excited for my sparkly toes as I do!

      <3
      cd

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    2. Hello Lily


      The bear is awesome and I was very glad that I found him for her! I love being a part of her world and helping her along! The coloring and the sparkling are also very nice bonuses!

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