Friday, July 19, 2013

The BEST Daddy in the Whole Wide World!

I could not have chosen a better Daddy for the boys than my Guardian. We took the boys to a local gymnastics place that has open gym hours on the weekend. There were all kinds of children and parents, and Guardian, who is still relatively new to being a Daddy, well, he moved easily between the two boys, more easily than these 'experienced parents'. He moved with such ease that we found ourselves playing not only with our boys, but with children at loose ends that other parents could not keep up with because they were with others of their brood. Today he has taken them for boy's day out...they've never had that. And it makes me so happy I could cry. They have never had a man take care of them like that. They have never had a man SEE them the way he does. And I am grateful

He is also a better Daddy than I could ever have hoped for for myself. I see what other Daddies in the kink community can be (Hello FetLife K&P O_o), and it can be scary. My Daddy, he sees when I am at loose ends, when I am overwhelmed, when little me is struggling, and he carves out places for me to just 'be' in the day. Daddy gives me daily tasks, to keep me centered during the day. Often those things are for my submissive self, because I am feeling a bit at loose ends or simply to keep me focused on him, on us. Others are things that are designed to make me stop and be gentle with myself. Once a task was - take 10 minutes and enjoy a piece of chocolate!

Most of the time, after having discovered little me, I felt that she was the small scared part of me; the part that endured horrific things; the part that was scared that she was 'bad', never good enough. Daddy coaxed her out. Little by little she would come out and see what he would do. He would literally and figuratively come to her level and invite her with open arms. She is more confident with him now. Sometimes, when I am overwhelmed, the tasks are designed for her to come out and play - color Daddy a picture, draw me something.

Daddy never thinks I am silly. He loves all of me, big me and little me. He enjoys being my!
I used to have an army of stuffed animals when I was little. Little by little I allowed people to tell me they were immature and the army dwindled. Daddy knows I love the minions! He had a friend of his make me one!

 Isn't he adorable?!

Daddy asked me what I wanted most in the whole wide world....and of course I said an otter! They are so adorable I could die!!!!! I mean who could resist??? 

And Daddy 
but Daddy why?
.....................................because they are wild animals, little one
but Daddy they're SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cute!!!
....................................they may be cute but they belong in the wild, where they will be happy
but they could be happy in the bathtub!
.....................................but not be really happy, little girl, they belong in the wild with other otters
Oooooo! Ooooooo! We could get two so they won't be lonlies!!!!!!

But THEN...... a package came and what was in the package?


One weekend we were going to the pool and passed a yard sale with the MOST adorable HUGE teddy bear. Daddy asked what I was looking at & I told him the big bear. We went to the pool and had a great day and when we came home Daddy said he forgot something in the car. I was getting the laundry together from the pool and when I came back to the living room, guess what I saw?

OMG!!!!!! Isn't he so gorgeous??? And yes it's pink, but it's a he 'cause Daddy and I had just watched a Twilight marathon and I wanted to name him Benjamin after my favoritest other vampire, the one who could control all the elements...... like the Avatar!!! I LOVE him! I thanked Daddy and told him I had wanted one and he asked why I hadn't told him. I said because I'm a grown woman and maybe it's silly. He said it wasn't silly at all, and I'm not a grown woman, I'm only 6 :)

So the bed that used to have nothing on it, now looks like this:

Theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen, after we saw Despicable Me 2 and went to Walmart they had MINION toys!!!!! And Daddy said we could get some. I was so excited! Then I said something about opening them and he :(    because they were collectibles and had to stay in the package. The boys thought that was terrible that I wasn't allowed to play with them. So we went BACK to Walmart but they were almost sold out, and Daddy said we'd keep checking back to get them all. But he also bought an extra:

Minion Phil!!!!

so I could play with him :D How awesome is that?

Little by little, day by day, he shows me it is okay to be who I am, that I don't have to hide any part of me from him, that it's okay to be little, it's okay to be silly, it's okay to color, it's okay to ooh and aah over bright colors and sparkles, it's okay to have a natural sense of wonder in the world around me, it's okay to cry over commercials and silly stuff, and there is never any little part of me that I need to hide from him. He loves all of me, all of the time, without reservation, without condition. And I love him the same way. I hope that I show him as boundlessly as he shows me. I have the BEST Daddy in the whole wide world.


It is a true honor to show My Chinadoll that I love her just as she is and that it's okay to have that beautiful sense of wonder that we all lost sometime along the way. She truly makes me feel alive in a way that I had been missing for many a year. She is my true treasure and I can be myself with her. I love that she can be little around me - her true self...that is a treasure!

Saturday, July 13, 2013


We have a thing we do.... we kind of talked about it in the 'that time of the month post'.... We do dailies. Sometimes more than once. Oh stop! It's not that bad.! I don't get corrected much because we do. So it works for us. Some spankings have a reason - stress relief, discipline (I'm a little bit out on the range and Daddy has to pull me back in), erotic, the just because....

The ones I'm talking about are what we call cuddle-spanks. And they are spankings, don't get me wrong, my Daddy is not one to waste an opportunity to make a point! And he says a spanking is ALWAYS a spanking. Cuddle spankings can last an hour or two..... or more. He alternates, me across his lap, side by side with me - he with his arm around my waist and facing the opposite direction, or laying beside me, playing with my hair, stroking my back, AND spanking.

But we talk (when I can - sometimes it's too intense for speech.....Daddy doesn't give love pats), about anything..... what we did that day, dinner, the need for chocolate, the movie we saw, or want to see, a decadent dessert we want to make. Issues with the kids, or something cute they did.... you get the idea....anything and everything.

It, as I said, does get intense at times - every spanking is discipline, reinforces our places and the fact that I belong to him. But it is lovely, and nice, and bonding, and so very us. It brings us closer, and allows us to focus on each other. So much better than an evening in front of the tube ;)


 It's more than something that we do, it really does bring us closer. The soft quiet hours of the evening long after the children have gone to bed, the dishes have been put away and we are at long last able to breathe and express our love to each other... Indeed it is a true pleasure to share such quality time with my little China Doll.. What could possibly bind us closer? This is truly intimacy unrivaled in one of it's most beautiful forms.